Seems like nothing has changed but when you look back, everything has changed updates for June, July, August, Sept, Oct, Nov.....

Greetings friends!  Has it REALLY been since MAY that I've updated my blog??  UGH I'm terrible I know!  So here comes a big update on what's been going on........

June, July and August proved to be busy with the kids and their variety of events.  School was out for the summer and that meant daily volleyball practice, camps and games.  That in itself keeps me on my toes.  We spent nearly everyday at the school for volleyball and a couple times went on trips related to the school volleyball program.  My daughter has such amazing dedication to the sport.

In July I tried to start exercising again- I was doing great for the first week, walking 3 miles a day on the treadmill at the gym.  I set out to try and be more active, try to drop a few pounds, if nothing else, just walking a bit.  After a week of doing this I was in so much pain and I couldn't walk!  I ended up at my chiropractor, IN TEARS because of the pain in my hips.  My right hip was the worst, with burning pain and literally every time I took a step it felt like it was locked up - it was terrible!  I had some acupuncture, some cold laser therapy and an incredibly painful adjustment on the first visit.  It felt so much better after that, I could actually walk out on my own with much less pain.  After two days of this treatment I was so much better but you better bet I wasn't getting back on that treadmill!! FORGET THAT SHIT!  I continued with this course of treatment for 3 days and the pain was finally gone.  The Dr said it was my bursis in my hip flaring up from lack of use to sudden over use - whatever, I wasn't doing it again!

August 12th school started up again which also meant I went back to work with the kids going back to school.  I love having the same schedule as the kids during the year and the summer off to be with them.  Even though the pay working at a school is crappy, it's better than nothing and gives me a schedule to follow, otherwise I would literally not do much of anything day in and day out - that I know!  It's hard sometimes to get up and go to work, really hard, but I do it because I know it's what I need, not only for the income I do get but for the schedule to follow.

September was a non-eventful month just getting back into the swing of a normal schedule everyday. I was extra tired trying to get back to waking up early and working all day but that's nothing new really, I don't think I ever really get use to it.  Still not exercising - can't take the chance of having a major flare like I did in August - oh god that was awful!  We are looking forward to a trip in October for fall break.

October we took a trip over fall break to California.  We've been really looking forward to this.  We planned to see family.  We went and saw my husbands mom for a few days and then went to visit my dad as well as my sister and her family in Palm Springs.  It was so great to see everyone and the kids.  We all live in different areas so we don't get to see each other but maybe once a year.  That's the drawback of living so far away from family.  I am in Colorado with my family, my sister is in California with her family, my husbands family is in California (1 brother in Colorado but 8 hrs away) and my dad is in Oklahoma.  So as you can see we are all spread out.

We were able to get some family pictures done while we were all together and that was wonderful.

Pretty good looking group if I do say so myself!  I'm in the yellow shirt next to my handsome hubby in the blue - my son is in the light yellow shirt and my beautiful daughter is holding her baby cousin.

November to current
Thanksgiving was great, I cooked a nice meal with the help of my daughter.  It was just us 4 but we had a feast and enough to feed us for another week to come!!  I need to learn to cook a little less on holidays!  Now it's that time of year again, the holidays are upon us.  For some of us this is a time of great fun, visiting with friends and family and going to party after party......... and for others it's a reminder that we aren't what we use to be.

I use to go shopping, now I shop online for 99% of the gifts I give....I can't physically go to the store and be on my feet for hours on end walking around browsing and picking out that perfect item....I use to attend many parties during the months of November and December...now I simply have to RSVP a NO because I really don't have the energy to smile and be "merry" for several hours at a time...Trust me when I say it's not because I don't want to or that I don't enjoy the company, it's not even close to that.....it's because my body just won't handle it and I'll end up paying for it for days to follow with pain and exhaustion.  It's just who I am now and I have to accept this as my reality.  As I like to say "It is what it is"...........it's been and has, more than ever, become my life motto.

I know I've been terrible at keeping my entries current and for that I am truly sorry - I really need to figure out how to just get it done......honestly after I am done working each day I am just so exhausted to do much of anything. I'm sure the words "I'm tired" are over used in my home by me and my family is sick of hearing it, but it's true.  I'm always tired, exhausted actually.  Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) has ruined me.  I've dealt with the CFS longer than I have the Fibromyalgia (FMS) but the two combined is a doozy as you may know or can just imagine.

I have yet to find anything, natural or otherwise, that gives me any kind of good, long lasting energy or the feeling that I can take on my days without the lingering feeling of pure exhaustion.  I did take Adderall XR for many years but it took a toll on me and my goal is to be off all RX medications and only treat my conditions as naturally as possible.  It's really turning out to be difficult.  I've tried everything I'm aware of that's out there.  Maybe I'm missing something or maybe my body is just not "normal" and doesn't respond to traditional things.  Vitamin B12 does nothing for me - I've tried regular injections with no luck.  My chiropractor couldn't believe that I really had no luck with the weekly injections over a course of 5 weeks.  Nope, nada.......abnormal response for most people

If anyone out there knows of something that could be helpful, I'm always willing to try if I haven't already.  I really feel desperate at times.  Along with the lack of energy comes a little weight gain because of the lack of motion.  I could, if life with 2 teens allowed, sit in my recliner day in and day out, only getting up to eat, visit the bathroom and maybe get a drink.  It's really sad for a 44 y/o to feel and act like a 94 y/o day in and out.  I do my best with the cards I've been dealt.

As for my pain related to FMS....it's always been primarily in my hips,  That's where it started and that's where it pops up the most.  As I shared from August, I had a terrible flare from exercising and it was in my hips.  My lower back and shoulders also have flares.  The most common thing I'm dealing with now is numbness and tingling in my right arm and hand.  At times the nerve that runs down the arm feels like it's on fire and that is just miserable.  Aside from those things I'm doing ok, the exhaustion from CFS seems to be worse now than the FMS but both are ever present, every day.

I still see my chiropractor every week when possible, in reality though it's more like every 2 weeks when I'm feeling well enough.  Without those treatments I don't think I would be in very good shape.  Adjustments really help so much.  More than anything else I've tried, keeping my body "straight" with regular adjustments seems to be the best treatment for ME.  I highly recommend you give it a try if you aren't having any relief of your FMS pain.  Find a good Chiropractor who is familiar with FMS and can effectively treat you.  It's worth it!

I'm looking forward to a 2 week break coming up.  December 19th - January 3rd is our "winter break" - we will of course be celebrating Christmas and New Years during that time.  I'm most likely going to cook a nice meal for Christmas - probably just a ham, mac and cheese and salad.  Nothing too terribly extravagant.  My family will go to The Outback Steak House on Christmas Eve - it's a tradition we started a few years ago instead of cooking a big meal at home.  I like having someone else do all the work and clean up!  Since it's just the 4 of us, it really makes sense.

I hope this update finds you well and coping well.  I know some might be having a hard time and I sincerely hope you find relief for yourself.  If there is any advice I could give it would be to not give up on finding what helps you!  Since FMS effects everyone so differently, you need to find what helps you - I know that what I suggest might not be your thing, I just know it's helped me get as much of my life back as possible and I will continue to search for more until I feel that I've exhausted every avenue.

I am going to leave you with a recent article I found - To your health and until next time!

FMS linked with Coronary Heart Disease

I find the above article interesting.  I have heart palpitations pretty regularly but my Dr has never been too concerned about it.  I also have family history of heart disease so I suspect as I get older I will start having regular heart check-ups to make sure my heart is not misbehaving.

Unbelievable!!! You have GOT TO READ this!

I'm going to get right to the point - I've stumbled on a product that is nothing short of amazing!  If you are like me, you have heard this before, been approached by people who claim to have what you need to make you feel better - only to be disappointed when it didn't work - well, from one chronic pain sufferer to another - I am not pulling your chain and I would NEVER vouch for something that didn't work on me!

If you are like me and live with pain all the time day in and day out then you have got to continue reading this and be prepared to share with everyone you love and know that lives with pain.

I for one don't take medication to relieve my pain.  I try all natural ways to control it and most of the time am just dealing with the pain as I go through my daily life.  I visit my chiropractor about every 2 wks to keep my body in line and working good.  I have found that these regular visits help more than anything else.

Long story short, a friend of mine told me about this product that relieves pain. She explained that it's all natural and there is nothing like it anywhere.  Like everything else my initial thought is "yeah right" - so she sent me a sample of this product to try.  It's basically a patch you put on where you experience pain.  You can check it out here!

For me, at the moment, my daily pain is located in my shoulder joint.  It's a deep aching pain that just won't give.  So I slapped this patch on my shoulder as instructed.  She said to let her know how it feels in the morning.  So I went about my business for the rest of the night and went to bed wearing this patch.  I didn't notice anything spectacular that night after applying the patch.  She had told me that some people may experience warmth where it's placed  but I did not have this sensation.

When I woke in the morning I moved my shoulder expecting to have my normal aches and pain - much to my surprise there was NO PAIN.....I moved my arm in all directions to try to find the pain and at the very most I could feel where the pain should be but it was so minor I wasn't sure if it was really even pain.

The patch is worn for 24-48 hrs with most of the relief happening around the 24 hr point.   This was just about 12 hrs of wearing the patch overnight and I was pain free for the first time in a good year!  You read this right - PAIN FREE!  In my world, that isn't something that you hear or get to experience!

AHHHHH, PAIN FREE....yes it's true!  A real product, an ALL NATURAL product that REALLY takes away pain where ever you have it!  This patch is brand new and only available through individuals who sell it.  I can tell you right now, I jumped at the opportunity to get my hands on more of these patches!  I have friends all over who will appreciate the pain free living that is awaiting them in this patch!  I want to make this a readily available product to anyone and everyone I know who suffers from chronic pain!  I know first hand how getting even a little relief from chronic pain is - to have something that is able to keep the pain away - PRICELESS!

For about $80/mo you get 15 patches - those patches can be cut to any size so you can actually make them last a full month or two if you cut them in half and wear one for 48 hrs at a time.

$80 might seem like a high price but whats worse?  Paying that much or more for a chemical RX to treat your pain or paying that much for an all natural pain remedy?  I would say the later of the two.  I look at it this way, I pay my chiropractor $45 a visit, per week, to relieve my pain.  I can take my $80 and purchase a package of patches and see my chiropractor every other week to keep everything in alignment.....no more money than I already spend and getting full time pain relief - WINNING!

If you are interested in more information about this amazing discovery please don't hesitate to contact me - I'm telling you it's going to be a game changer for people who live with Chronic Pain - it's new and powerful!

With excitement I look forward to hearing from those of you who are serious about living pain free!

For the first 6 people who contact me, I will send you a free sample of this amazing product - I believe in it 100%!

To your health (and living pain free!)

Gerri

A quick update and vent.....

I saw the Dr today - he was hesitant to agree to give me a referral to the Mayo Clinic but he wrote one out anyway after I convinced him that was my next stop - only for me to later find out that he will need to call it into them. So that's another call, email or visit I'll have to figure out.

My one question right now is WHY in the world do Dr's make it SO difficult to get into to see them and/or talk with them. Especially Dr's who see people with chronic health problems - don't they know that we have needs that need to be addressed sooner rather than later??

I am so frustrated and feel that I've just run out of juice in this fight.....I need to refuel though because I know there is a lot more fighting to do until I come to a point where my symptoms are being successfully managed. I have so many questions and want so many tests run to rule out other potential underlying issues - but for some reason this particular Dr doesn't want to do these tests.......I don't get it.

I went ahead and had him change my meds again to go back on the Venlafaxine (Effexor) - as I had mentioned before, in retrospect, this one seems to be the best at keeping my pain at bay and my mood at a stable point. Although a nasty med to come off of, it does it's job......I guess we live and learn. Too bad I had to endure the withdrawls of coming off it just to get back on it....I feel like I've just gone in one big circle. OH wait, I did!

One big disapointment from today's visit - I asked the Dr to run an ANA panel and he wouldn't do it - it's a blood test to check for any potential autoimmune issues (ie, Lupus, Multiple Sclerosis) he feels that if anything I could have an immune deficiency vs an autoimmune disorder or issue - I don't understand why he wouldn't run the blood test to rule out the autoimmune disorders if I requested it........I'm not happy about it. He said I might want to see an allergist for testing to see if my immune system is deficient in any areas..........now an allergist, really?

I'm at the point of extreme frustration, exhaustion and just simply ready to say screw it....I know I can't......but I need some fire back in my fight because I've hit so many brick walls I'm beginning to crumble against them. I'm trying to be strong and believe and be positive but it's so very hard right now. It seems that no matter where I turn there is that wall being put up....I get around it only to find another one...and another...and another.......

I'm going on a year now since I first got sick and all of this began......it's been a huge challenge for not only me, but my entire family has had to endure every aspect of my illness from my daily gripes to the Dr's to the bills that are piling up....to my lack of being able to work like I use to and to my daily frustrations...it isn't easy and I love them so much for staying by my side through all of this and just simply understanding. I know it hasn't been easy on them.

I did make a call to the Mayo Clinic and at this point am not sure the program they have is really what I need - honestly at this point I feel lost and just don't know what I need........I wish someone would just take me, run every possible test they can, rule out anything they can and get me on the RIGHT PATH to wellness. I've done everything I've been told to do from exercising to changing my diet and eating "right", to watching my sugar intake, to taking meds to sleeping more etc.....I don't know what else to do because none of the "suggestions" have made a large enough impact on my health to make me feel like I'm even close to where I need to be.....or back to myself prior to getting sick - will I ever be that person again??

With all that said - I have no other choice but to move forward.......onward I go, forward to the next step whatever that might be..........

Still here......still in the thick of things

Hello friends and followers! I'm still here, I haven't been much into posting an update since my last one, although there is plenty to update....... Health status is pretty much status quo although I can say the withdrawl from the Effexor is gone and I'm settling in with the new medication, Savella - although now that I look back I think the Effexor was the best medication to be on for both depression, mood and pain - as I was getting off the Effexor I noticed a considerable increase in leg pain especially at my hips after getting up from sitting down....my ankles and my knees as well - this pain wasn't really noticable while I was on the Effexor, it was only after I stopped that medication that I really noticed it and had trouble with walking most of the time.

SO what to do what to do - one reason I went off the effexor was due to it's high cost - and my son going on medications I just couldn't afford both - so I did what any parent would do and sacraficed my own health needs for that of my son's well being.

It's been about 2 months now since the medication switch and I'm just not sure what to do. The Savella has started to work as the pain in my hips, knees and ankles isn't as prominent as it was while the going through the switch over, however I definitely notice a difference in my general mood. I have an appointment today with my Dr so we'll see what he thinks. I would really hate to go through yet another change in the meds, it's so hard to go through that and I really just want to be at the point of being able to resume my regular activities with little to no pain and discomfort. Wishful thinking? Maybe.......probably.....

Research, Research and more research!

I've been looking into different options and places both nationally and locally to go to in order to get some good treatment and on the right path - locally there are a few places that treat Fibromyalgia, one of them being The Fibromyalgia and Pain Centers - however upon looking at them I was told they are not taking on new patients - so moving on from there I found the Colorado Fibromyalgia Center in Lafayette, CO - I have an appointment with them for the end of the month.

I'm also looking into getting in at the Rochester, MN Mayo Clinic for an exam and treatment. I think if anyone is going to get me on the right path to wellness they can. They have a specialized Fibromyalgia Clinic there that only takes patients on referral, so that's one thing I'll be asking for today at my appointment. I'm really hoping they can not only get me in ASAP but also give me a great head to toe exam and either confirm the diagnosis of Fibromyalgia/CFS or find anything else that could be going on and causing me all the symptoms I've been dealing with and continue to have. So keeping fingers crossed. If I can get into the Mayo Clinic then I'll be canceling my appointment at the Lafayette clinic for now. I'm sure at some point I'll have to take up care here locally as I don't foresee me being able to travel to MN every few weeks for follow up appointments. It's a starting point anyway.

If you have ever done any kind of research into this disease you will know that there is all kinds of information to be found, most of which will say that the cause is unknown and that there are many potential types of ways to treat it, some conventional, some not so conventional. Because of this, it can be tricky to find providers who treat the disease. Research has come a long way on it and is continuing to carve a trail for the treatment of Fibromyalgia. In fact, I spoke to the medical director at the University of Colorado Executive Health Program yesterday as I was looking at going to see them - he pretty much reminded me that this disease is SO hard to treat and said that his particular program was not for me. This sent me for a full day of tears..........only because it was just another brick wall put up in front of me, and I'm so tired....so stressed.....so sick of being sick! I couldn't help it and I just broke down. My poor kids and husband are enduring a lot with all of this as well. My son sat with me at one point last night and said to me "Mom, you are so strong, and you can beat this thing........I know it's hard but you just have to believe! Believe that you will get through this and get better and you will! Remember, there are people out there who beat cancer, because they believe they will" - what an amazing child - he's only 9 and has such a grasp on life.

One thing that is of a concern too is that there are other diseases that cam mimick Fibromyalgia and CFS - such as Lupus, Multiple Sclerosis, Lyme Disease, Candida infections...and the list goes on - I'm at the point that I just don't know if I truly have fibromyalgia/CFS or if something else is lurking in my body that just hasn't been discovered as of yet. Being that I am in a constant stage of feeling sick...not so much pain at this point, just like I'm coming down with the flu all the time........feeling crappy day in and day out definitely takes a toll on you....if you have this terrible disease then you know exactly what I'm referring to...if not...you just have to take my word for it and know that when I say I don't feel good....I REALLY DON'T...........

Even though you might see me out at the pool with the kids, out at the grocery store......out at a fabulous fun Slumber Party for a client.....you might see me at the Park or walking my dogs with my husband.........you might see me and think to yourself "well she doesn't look like she is suffering".....but inside and all the time I am just not what I use to be. I honestly feel, deep down, that what I have could very well be Fibromyalgia - but I also feel there is more to it than JUST that......and that's what I'm on the search for. I am on a mission and will go to the end of the world to find out what is going on and how to fix it. This is a fight that I'm not giving up on...although there are many times I just want to say "I GIVE UP" and go crawl under a rock.....it's easy for people to forget...I see it happen all the time....I've lost some friends because I can't be out and about with them....I decline going out with them because I just don't have the energy to do it. I hate it...I hate this disease....I HATE THAT I'VE BEEN PUT TO THIS CHALLENGE! But regardless of how I feel about it, it is what it is and I have to find a way to get through it, learn to live with it and find a way to be here for my family for many more years.

One more thing - I had a few people ask me if I've been juicing and sadly the answer is no - if you recall, my juicer broke, I ordered a replacement part which I still don't have as the company said it's on backorder - so I stopped juicing for that reason and the fact that I didn't notice it making much of a real difference overall.......I may take it back up if I ever get this replacement part to my juicer.....the replacement juicer I purchased wasn't cutting it so between all that, I just kind of fell off the juicing wagon.....I might just have to get back on it though - it takes a lot of will power to keep at it that I'm just not sure I have in me right now with everything else going on......plus, if I'll be traveling then that will cut right back into my efforts - so I might hold off until I get a handle on what the immediate future holds for me......

I'll post an update later after my appointment - hopefully it'll be a great update with a referral to the Mayo Clinic!

I feel like a Yo-Yo - Up....then down....constantly changing

Hello! Let me start off by warning you, this is a long update with several things that are going on - so bear with me as I ramble on about all this!
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Many people call me and one of the first things that they say is "how are you feeling" or "how are you doing" - my most common response, as many of you know is "it depends on the day and sometimes the hour" - because from day to day everything changes. One day I feel great, one day I want to just sleep all day...one day I have pain all over, etc and it's constantly changing like this on a daily, sometimes hourly basis. So just because yesterday was a great day doesn't, by any means, mean that today is going to be the same - I sure wish it did though!

In fact yesterday (4/27) was one of those "not so great" days - I was just simply
exhausted from the moment I woke up......it was just one of "THOSE" days. I went out and did a few things, met up with a friend for a light lunch, did a couple errands and after I got home didn't move off my chair. Today on the other hand has been a much better day - I even took a nice long walk this morning. I'm not as exhausted as I was yesterday and not having as much pain in my legs, although it's still there. My ankles and feet are quite sore on a frequent basis as well.

I also have been continuing to work on figuring out this sleep study I need to do - my Dr was able to hook me up with a company that does "at home" sleep studies - so instead of being a cost of $3000 this is $500 and I do it at home. The only thing I need to talk to my Dr about is the fact that this particular company is "out of network" for me which means it won't apply to our "in network" deductible - so I need to see if he knows of another company he can hook me up with instead of this one - either way I'm happy that I can do it for much less AND at home.....as of now, if I go with the "out of network" company, I'm scheduled to start it next WED and it lasts for 3 days......they will send me all the machines and sensors and when I'm done I will send it all back for them to analyze and report to my Dr. I'm super hopeful that this is just another step to me feeling better......if in fact the underlying factor of my chronic fatigue is because of sleep apnea then I should be a new person once I get hooked up with an apnea machine. I'm hopeful anyway that this is that "one step closer".............

For those of you reading this blog who might not have to deal with chronic issues please take a moment to read the story about "The Spoon Theory". It really gives a great analogy about someone who has chronic illness and will help those of you out there who don't have to deal with it and maybe just don't understand what it's like in the daily life of someone who does. I often times wonder just how many people out there think to themselves "oh just deal with it, you'll be fine" when in all reality, each day is a huge battle to function. I hope the story helps you understand a little better and helps you know that someone who has this is truly living from minute to minute and having to make decisions about their activities that most people don't. For anyone who thinks that these "silent illnesses" are a bunch of bologna, I honestly hope that this helps give you some insight.

I would love to hear back from those of you who read the above story with what you think about it.....

The medication withdrawl is going much better than the last update - I still get those weird sensations in my head but not constantly like it was, rather just a few times a day which has been much nicer. I had about a week of feeling annoyed at everyone and everything.....my poor family had to endure that nasty mood swing and for that I feel bad.....especially because I knew I was in a bad place but couldn't do anything about it. I am glad that it seems that the withdrawl period is not going to be constant and last as long as I had feared it would. The mood seems to have passed for the most part and overall I'm feeling that the "withdrawl" is lessening. I hope it lasts! The new medication I'm on, I can't really say much about just yet as I'm not sure about it. I am beginning to wonder though if getting off the old one was a smart move since I'm having much more pain than I previously had while on it - I guess it was working and I just didn't realize it was! But either way, I'm glad to be getting off it because of #1 the cost of it and #2 the withdrawl symptoms it would give even if missing even just one dose.....certainly there are other meds out there to give a try that aren't as heavy when coming off them......I actually want to give Lyrica a try...I've heard it's a good one for my condition.

On another note, my son has been on a new medication since the beginning of this month - long story short, he has had "issues" since he was a baby - we have dealt with Sensory Integration Dysfunction and ADHD since he was 1 - he is going to be 10 in July and over the past several months he has been having a rough time with his ADHD - I am not sure the diagnosis of ADHD really still fits him so we are in the process of getting another or rather a renewed diagnosis from his Dr. He hasn't been on medications for this until recently because nothing we did was helping him, he seems to have gotten worse over time and my husband and I really just needed some help with him......it is definitely more than him just being a kid trying to get his way too - definitely more. He has something going on inside his little body that nothing we could do was going to help - I'm so glad that we recognized this and got him the help he obviously needs.

Since starting his new medication he has done a 180.......at school and for the most part at home....he has had way more better days/nights than he has had bad with the exception of a few good blow outs (compared to constantly having problems with his behavior and attitude). We are pleased with the result of his medication and he is as well - he can really notice a difference too. We go in next Wed to see his Dr for a follow up and to determine what MG dose he needs to be on - we have "played with" several from 10mg to 60mg and think 60mg (out of 70mg) is where he will be, with maybe a little booster in the afternoons....we'll see.

It's really been a tough road with both of us...I have never mentioned my son in this blog only because this blog is about me finding my health, however, being that his actions, behavior and all that comes with that is a huge part of my life, at times will also effect my health - mostly my mental health!

Changing from one medication to another....why so difficult, why?

Well I'll get right to the point of this update - medication withdrawl...specifically the withdrawl effects of discontinuing Effexor

I saw my Dr the other day and after some discussion he decided we should change my medication - so I'm completely going off of the Effexor (Venlafaxine is the generic one I've been on) and moving to another medication that is actually specifically for treating Fibromyalgia. The new one is called Savella. I made the name of it a clickable link to info about it for those of you who are curious and will want to look it up :)

Effexor is actually a Depression medication that in high doses has been known to help with the symptoms of Fibro - after telling my Dr that I didn't feel it was helping either way he decided to try this new one. Honestly until the effects of coming off the Effexor are done, I don't think I'll know if the new one is working.

Although I knew I would experience withdrawl symptoms, as I've tried to discontinue Effexor in the past, I think it's time to try to ride this out and see if this new medication will make any difference for me. Unfortunately the two can't be taken together, so I had to completely stop the effexor instead of a gradual decrease which is what is really recommended to come off the drug - although in the past, the gradual decrease still gave me the same withdrawl symptoms so I don't suppose it really matters much if I still have to deal with the withdrawls symptoms that don't seem to be less on the gradual decrease of the medication.

For anyone who has never had to deal with such a thing, the best way to describe it is a form of dizziness which also causes a nausea feeling - kind of like electrical sensations and dizziness combined - brain shivers or the sensation that your brain is moving around in your head or faster than your head from side to side. However you describe it, it's miserable for lack of better words.

So today is the 3rd day of dealing with it and I'm hoping, no I'm praying that an end is in sight - I really don't have any idea how long it is suppose to last and have read it could last anywhere from a short length of time to an extended period of time - I can't do extended so I'm hoping for short.

I will be calling in this week to set up the sleep study I've been putting off for a while now - I just found out last week, and I didn't realize, that initially I was diagnosed with sleep apnea in 1997 - so a new sleep study is definitely needed in order to determine if the apnea has stayed the same or gotten worse - if I were a betting person I would bet it's gotten significantly worse as my chronic fatigue has gotten significantly worse over the years - a common problem for those who suffer from sleep apnea is also extreme chronic fatigue due to the lack of restful, reguvenating sleep on a daily basis (even though I sleep a min of 8 hrs a day!)........so we'll see - really right now I have little faith in the medical professionals or their solutions to all the various problems I am currently dealing with, have dealt with and will, I'm sure continue to deal with in the future. I've been putting it off as we can't really afford the test (it's a whole insurance deductible issue for us) but basically we pay full pop until the individual deductible is met - so we're just biting the bullet - if this is possibly one thing that can make a huge difference in how I feel it's time, it's been time to just get it done. On the flip side of the insurance, once the deductible is met they pay 100% for all medical needs - so I guess it's a given and take kind of thing....

Until next time - stay well and please, if your Dr ever suggests EFFEXOR for you, find out if there is something else that has very little to no withdrawls so when it's time for you to stop taking the medication you won't have to deal with the electric dizziness of stopping it...seriously, if I knew then what I know now, I would of opted for a different medication entirely!